I'd Lie
by FearlesslyDancing
Summary: there are a lot of things that you don't know about lily evans and james potter. there's an untold story between all of that trauma and anguish. and i'm here to tell it.


"I'd Lie"

**** ****

************** **************  
***he'd NEVER tell you, but he can _play_ guitar***  
i **T.H.I.N.K** he can see through everything but my **heart**  
first thought when I wake up is, "my god, he's _beautiful_"  
so i put on my makeup and **P.R.A.Y** for a _miracle_  
yes, i could tell you his favorite color's green  
he **l.o.v.e.s.** to argue, oh, and it KILLS me  
his sister's _beautiful_, he has his father's  
************eyes************  
and if you asked me if i **love **him  
if you ask me if i _love_ him,  
****** i'd lie******  
-taylor swift; _i'd lie  
_**********

*

lily&james

a/n. there are a lot of things that you don't know about lily evans and james potter. there's an untold story between all of that trauma and anguish. and I'm here to tell it.

love always,  
fearless

lily&james

lily knew a lot of things she wished she didn't. because with every bit of knowledge, came an emotion. and it hurt.

she was in love with james potter.

sure, she knew, she'd known _all along. _hell, she'd even accepted it. but after six years of that cold-hearted external façade, she couldn't just "fall in love" with him in a day. her secret clawed at her insides and every time, _every time, _she turned and saw him, or even heard his laugh echo down the corridor, it pulled at the strings of her heart a little more, playing a song she hadn't heard in so long.

**love.**

but no one else knew. no one else _could _know. especially not him. so, as the harp her heart seemed to slowly be becoming was played, it also ripped with every appearance of him around a corner and especially with every syllable of his voice. it made her sick. but the heart wants what the heart wants. and not even the brain of hard-headed lily evans could change that.

she knew several select things about him, things that other people ((other than maybe sirius or remus)) didn't know. in fact, there were six, to be exact.

one. james potter is, in fact, musically gifted. he played guitar quite well, actually. lily became acutely aware of her heart thumping even louder than normal when she caught him softly strumming and singing quietly to himself in the heads' common room. she swore she fell a little more in love.

two. he seemed to know everything. he could always see through sirius' moods and was quite aware of everything going on around him. except for the irrational, erratic beating of lily's heart. because that he couldn't know. she'd promised herself.

three. his favorite color is green. it was because of her eyes. she heard him whisper it to remus one day during charms. one particular day, she mused, that she was picked to exhibit her skill in front of the class. eyes wide, she walked to the front of the room, eager to share the skill of her trade, when james caught her eye.

four. he loves to argue. it might be his favorite pastime, other than messing with that bloody snitch that makes her want to kiss him. he is perverse and unrelenting. but that doesn't ever change. he just loves to start rows. with lily. with sirius. with mcgonagall. it's endless. personally, they make her day.

five. his sister's beautiful. it seems that both potter children were gifted with wonderful genes. she saw a picture of the adorable eight year-old when she went into his dorm for the first time, to find him for patrolling duty. she waved at you from inside her frame and lily found herself smiling, watching her stunning face. she looked like him.

six. he has his father's eyes. she noticed this the first time she got off of the hogwarts express, ready to greet her parents and return home for the summer. as she hugged her father, she saw the potter family over his shoulder, greeting him. that pair of eyes was exact. they were beautiful.

but, in recognizing these things, she also came to realizations about herself. six things, to match his.

one. no matter how much she told herself that he couldn't find out about her…. attraction to him, she knew she had to tell him… because there was no way that james was going to come to the realization by himself. six years of rejection ensured that.

two. she almost always dreamed of him and when she woke up, he was still there, fresh in her mind, the smooth planes of his face, jaw prominent and cheeks chiseled, his lips the forbidden fruit. he was beautiful.

three. she prayed. she really did. she wanted an out, a way to become his without seeming like a hypocrite. it was _hard. _so, she turned to the higher power while putting on her makeup. after all, it couldn't get any worse.

four. his arguments killed her inside. they made her shrink down, and defend herself, throwing back unladylike comments. but when he argued his face got all flushed and he breathed harder, barely stopping to take a break. it was very… tempting. and she _hated _it. it needed to stop…

_before_ she ended up accidentally kissing him.

five. if anyone questioned her, she'd lie. because she didn't want to seem like _"that type" _of girl. the ones who were always hanging off of sirius' arm. the giggly, flirty, obsessive ones. but that didn't change her feelings.

six. she was absolutely and irreversibly in love with him.

_fin. _

{{.}}

**** ****

************** **************  
***he'd NEVER tell you, but he can _play_ guitar***  
i **T.H.I.N.K** he can see through everything but my **heart**  
first thought when I wake up is, "my god, he's _beautiful_"  
so i put on my makeup and **P.R.A.Y** for a _miracle_  
yes, i could tell you his favorite color's green  
he **l.o.v.e.s.** to argue, oh, and it KILLS me  
his sister's _beautiful_, he has his father's  
************eyes************  
and if you asked me if i **love **him  
if you ask me if i _love_ him,  
****** i'd lie******  
-taylor swift; _i'd lie  
_**********

*


End file.
